Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in Dorian Red Gloria, Earl of Gloria's LiveJournal:

[ << Previous 20 ]

Sunday, May 30th, 2004
8:39 pm	WHAT?! Am utterly distraught at thought of poor Darling in dire straits, without me to rescue him! Even worse is thought of missing chance to see him in Japanese rope bondage! Wonder if he was nude at the time! Ah! Agony and nosebleeds! What grudge does Fate hold against me, to wreak such havoc on my poor, aesthetically-deprived heart? Current Mood: distraught! (ensnare me!)
Sunday, May 23rd, 2004
9:59 pm	Oh, dear... Just out of curiosity... has anyone seen eberbach since his last post? (ensnare me!)
Thursday, January 15th, 2004
9:10 am	Eureka! Of course! Why didn't I see it before? eberbach was called "Potato Klaus" by his childhood peers for a reason! I've been trying to seduce him with the WRONG vegetable entirely! Be patient, my darling! I'm off to find the biggest, longest, most gorgeous potato *ever*! Current Mood: ecstatic (1 sadistic entanglement | ensnare me!)
Monday, January 27th, 2003
1:26 pm	Smirk! Major took one look at me and fabulous cucumber, then shrieked like a girl and tore back up the stairs to his room, obviously overcome with desire to take cucumber for a test run right *now*! Go, me! Patience, my half-naked darling! I won't leave you wanting for long! Current Mood: smug (ensnare me!)
1:13 pm	What's all this?! Party at Schloss and I was not invited? How could they think of having a party without *ME*? Party without me is no more entertaining than Bucharest on a Monday night! Boys all drunk as lords, Klaus's butler is prancing around like some kind of idiot fop when not face-down on the floor in drunken stupor, and even BONHAM is participating in this Eroica-less travesty of a party! Worse--what was Z doing alone in bedroom with half-naked Major?! Would demand satisfaction from him, but... would much rather demand satisfaction from half-naked Major! Current Mood: devilish (ensnare me!)
Sunday, November 17th, 2002
10:00 pm	Where is everyone? I come home from horrifying ordeal of ladies' rest room anticipating a little tender loving care and perhaps some masculine attention to counteract horror of all that femininity, and what do I find? Whole place empty, door ajar, note on refrigerator that says, "Sorry, your Lordship, but we got an offer we couldn't refuse!" Hmph. Well, plus side is that Mr. James isn't here to screech at me for money wasted on more produce--but I *needed* a little pick-me-up after that terrifying ordeal! And lovely cucumber was simply too good to pass up! Think I might wander on over to the Major's neck of the woods. Won't be all that long a trip, and Mr. James isn't here to protest travelling expense! Darling Major, cucumber and I are on our way! >) Current Mood: anticipatory! (ensnare me!)
Thursday, November 14th, 2002
12:40 pm	Horror! Well! Finally got loose from handcuffs, though took much longer than should have been necessary due to distracting presence of screaming girls and their... girl things! Horror! Don't mind dressing up every now and then, but NO man of my leaning should be confronted with an eyeful of *that*! Anyway! Finally escaped, though have vowed vengeance against horrible Der Spike for subjecting me to such HORROR! Will have to spend at least two hours scrubbing now! ...what's this? Note tucked in my pocket, addressed to "moronic queer produce-fancying pervert?" Suppose it could be for me... Current Mood: curious (ensnare me!)
10:00 am	What happened? Don't understand. One minute have lovely Mister A over my shoulder and am planning enjoyable time nursing poor dear back to health. Next minute am faced with terrifying Der Spike! Moustache most alarming, in evilly non-seductive sort of way! Then somehow, seem to have lost a few hours. Next thing I know, I'm waking up in a restroom of all places, handcuffed to pipes under the sink. Silly Der Spike. Did he think *Eroica* wouldn't be able to pick free of handcuffs? Will be out of here in no time; just need a few moment's concentration. Oh, my God! Oh, MY GOD! IT'S A... LADIES' ROOM!!! Current Mood: horrified! (ensnare me!)
Tuesday, November 12th, 2002
10:49 am	How did that happen? My God! One moment I'm cheerfully carrying that sweet Mr. A up to my room to apply some of my best healing techniques, and the next moment I discover I've somehow ended up with Der Spike instead! Moustache is so scary! And where is dear Mr. A? Hope Der Spike hasn't done anything dastardly to him! Where, oh where is Major when I need big, strong brute of a man to run the scary moustachioed man off? Current Mood: nervous! (ensnare me!)
Monday, November 11th, 2002
5:48 pm	Today's forecast--Big Lucky! Was walking along in the general direction of the Major's office, minding my own business and of course not planning anything naughty, when who should I happen to stumble across but exhausted Herr A? Poor dear seems to have caught the brunt of the Major's temper--again--and looks to be on the verge of collapse. Would be unseemingly cruel and merciless to turn him out into the street! Will simply have to nurse him back to health, the poor dear. Luckily, that last produce purchase is still fresh. Will have dear Herr A feeling better in no time! >) Current Mood: Lucky! (ensnare me!)
4:09 pm	All in the family? Oh, dear. Scrumptious Major and "good" German boy Z are possibly related? And I still have fond memories of snuggling naked with both of them in deserted cabin in Alaska! ...a bit kinky, even for me, if they turn out to be related. But, too late to do anything about it now, and memory too delicious to be set aside! Mmm, naked Major and Z... only thing better would've been having unbitten cucumber in easy reach. >) Current Mood: nostalgic (4 sadistic entanglements | ensnare me!)
12:00 pm	Joy! Major asked me what I would want for Christmas! Even hinted that it might be something in red! KNEW he couldn't resist my charms much longer--even noticed that red is smashing on me! Only question is, should I ask for devastatingly sexy red outfit in kinky smut catalogue, or devastatingly sexy red sports car? Already have one devastatingly sexy red sports car. Kinky red outfit it is! Current Mood: delighted anticipation! (2 sadistic entanglements | ensnare me!)
Monday, October 7th, 2002
8:14 am	An inane quiz--from the Major? Poor Major must be completely distraught at lack of caffeine--now he's doing Internet quizzes? Still, if Darling Major does a quiz, I must ( take it as well! ) Oh, dear. Aside from fact that Potter quizzes really are beneath me... this quiz couldn't be more wrong about my personality! I may be destructive at times, but not *murderous*! And the slur against my intelligence is entirely uncalled-for! Also, one notes that, according to the quiz's analysis of my compatibility code with the Major's: It's not going to work (like mixing red with navy clothes - what was I thinking!). You two are obviously very different people, and although you may share some similar traits, you're better off getting a copy of 'Magical Me' than going out together. Stupid quiz. >_ Current Mood: irritated (ensnare me!)
Tuesday, June 18th, 2002
8:46 am	British men do not *whine*! Definitely need food! Ride in stupidly-brutalized Benz is going to take for-bloody-ever, and Z not being very helpful. Said to quit whining. Followed that up with "hunger is a matter of discipline." Was very polite, and bit back urge to inform him that he is no Major Eberbach. Did not, however, bite back urge to snap, "I'll show you discipline, if you don't get us back to civilization in a hurry!" Long-suffering look really is quite attractive on him. Reminds me very much of Klaus, which is always a good thing... except, of course, for sizeable bald spot in back, which Klaus thankfully does not share. Probably best not to mention that to Z, though, since we are still in the middle of nowhere. Do wish he would put the pedal to the metal! Delicate constitutions require regular sustenance! Current Mood: hungry but NOT whiny! (ensnare me!)
Monday, March 11th, 2002
1:24 pm	But I was just warming up to the 'rustic' decour! Damn. Hate to leave cabin, but have exhausted supply of cucumbers. After protracted use they... lose their freshness. HATE wilting produce. It's pathetically sad. Oh, and Z reminds me that we have no food. Current Mood: sad (ensnare me!)
9:23 am	More IT! Not with Klaus, though still good. Z very enthusiastic about whole experience, being tremendous slut and all. Wonder if he has slutty genes, or if all good German boys can be trained like this. DEFINITELY need to find out!! Probably could have left him untied, but have to practice knot-tying skills if I want to keep in top form. Just like A, had Z screaming with pleasure in no time. Didn't have to gag him. In middle-of-nowhere cabin don't have to worry about disturbing neighbours. But he does keep mentioning 'his turn'. Such a silly slut! He thinks he gets a turn... Current Mood: getting IT (ensnare me!)
9:17 am	MORNING!! And quite a good one too. Woke when Z put his hand down *there*. Would have been even better had Major been the one to put his hand down *there*, but he seems to have disappeared sometime during night. Can't be too concerned right now, with Z doing THAT. Anyone who does THAT so nicely can be forgiven for being tremendous slut. Now, if only could reach... cucumber... could show him a thing or two... Current Mood: awake (ensnare me!)
3:57 am	But I'm supposed to be the most flexible one! Is both disgusting and happy that Major is incredibly flexible, maybe as much as me. Disgusting because is *my* gimmick, and happy because can finally try all those triple-black-diamond positions in back of the Gay Kama-Sutra. But not until all the cucumbers are used up. Major hasn't even broken a sweat! If he had, would understand better how he evaded my repeated attempts to get him in double ball-buster groin hold. Single nut-twister groin hold not nearly so effective. He broke free right away, and after that had to follow Z's example and just tackle him. No wonder Z likes tackling technique. Lacks finesse, but was very good opportunity for putting hands all over good hard German body. Am exhausted. Tackling *very* difficult work, but also very rewarding. Am IN BED with my darling Klaus!! With very big slut Z too, but is okay, so long as he keeps to his half of the Major. Mmn, Major's shoulder very nice place to rest head, even with endless stream of cussing being very close to ear. Will rest here for just... a minute, until I get second... wind... *yawn* Current Mood: sleepy (ensnare me!)
1:36 am	Kiss and make better. Perhaps shouldn't have written off winkie-biting slut German boys so quickly, as Z has promised to 'kiss it and make it better'. Though would feel vastly more better if Major was one doing the 'making it better'. He *should* be the one to do it, as was because of his eating precious cucumber that I screamed, and Z bit. Apologised in return about pulled-out hair. Lied and said large bald-spot not noticeable, though gently suggested Z should ask Major's Butler to share silly comb-over technique. Hope there are no mirrors in cabin, or barring that, no scissors. Suspect Z's streak of fairness extends to revenge. Now, about Major. Seems to think bathroom is safety of some kind. Is right to some extent. Nasty cold tile floor absolutely wrong for *it*. Will have to drag him back to lumpy musty mattress, which is only slightly better. Will have to not-look at half-devoured cucumber carcass. Did he have to toss it on the floor?! Poor cucumber deserved so much better. Thankfully, have reserve special cucumber, just for such emergencies. Current Mood: recovering (ensnare me!)
1:04 am	Oh GOD! He bit it, clean through! That was my *favourite* cucumber, the one I'd been hoarding for a very special occasion! Winkie not doing so well either, as clumsy dolt Z couldn't seem to keep from knocking it with teeth. Is final straw! Hurtey teeth on tender winkie is *very* poor substitute for *it*. Want nothing further to do with slut German boys *or* produce-dispatching Major!! Now, fallen-to-floor-in-defenseless-faint Major different matter entirely. Forget handcuffs; saw roll of duct tape around cabin somewhere... (3 sadistic entanglements | ensnare me!)